your fate is my toilet

luther burger by 'hero certified burgers' & 'krispy kreme'

rating: 2010 MS Allure of the Seas / 10.0

HUGO & THE FRINGE FESTIVAL - II

I reached Kahlil Gibran's house and waited for five to seven minutes outside of his house. He got into my car and called ee cummings. We were going to a free outdoor screening of the 'relatively new' Scorsese film, Hugo, later on. Right now, ee cummings was sitting in a Second Cup chain cafe near an asian grocery store called Ocean's. I drove over there and we met him. We all got into his SUV and he drove to an asian bakery, but it was closed, so we went to a restaurant called Noodle Chai restaurant or something like that.

ee cummings wanted to go to Noodle Chai restaurant because he thought Sharukh Khan always said the word 'chai' in all his favourite Bollywood movies, even though it was really from Slumdog Millionaire. Eating at a place called 'Noodle Chai' consequently made him feel like Shahrukh Khan, which generally feels like being an old person, but also feels like being sexy and relatively desirable to South Asian women all over the world.


I ordered shrimp wanton noodle soup and ee cummings and Kahlil Gibran both ordered the same thing as me. ee cummings said he had never eaten a meal like this before. He said he felt like he was in an anime show eating noodles out of a soup bowl with chopsticks. I finished approximately five minutes before they did, and ee cummings said I ate as fast as the people in anime shows and he wanted to be just like me when he grew up. I wanted to punch him in the face but I felt too tired and melodramatic.

When we finished, we were late for the 'relatively new' Scorsese film, but we went back to the Second Cup chain store first anyways to buy unpretentious drinks to drink while watching the 'relatively new' Scorsese film. Kahlil Gibran and ee cummings both bought a drink called 'frozen hot chocolate' which was the chain cafe's attempt at low-level irony. I did not want to have a drink that had a low-level ironic name, so I got a green apple smoothie instead, which was the least pretentious drink because it very likely contained nothing that actually originated from a real green apple. It was a fake drink, but at least it wasn't pretentious. There was a difference, I thought. I ordered a size small and finished it before we got to the public square where they were screening the 'relatively new' Scorsese film. 

We each carried a lawn chair, and saw the whole square was full of people. We sat approximately forty feet away from the last row of clustered lawn chairs and watched the two screens that were 2/7ths way through with the 'relatively new' Scorsese film. Many children rode scooters and 'wave boards' in between us and the last row of clustered lawn chairs. 

This 'relatively new' Scorsese film was 'quasi-meta' in many ways. It was not as 'meta' as '8½' by Fellini, but it was generally a 'self-referential' film, about films and the history of films. This reminded me of my life and how I felt like all the relationships in my life were meta-relationships with meta-friends. I had noticed recently how each friendship I had was about being friends with the person I was friends with, and nothing more substantial. I was not sure exactly what that meant, but it gave me vague feelings of detachment and self-removedness. 

Half way into the movie, ee cummings left. He was going to Brampton to watch a film starring Sharukh Khan. Ten minutes later Kahlil Gibran received a phone call. It was William Blake. He was going to drive us downtown to see a show at the Fringe Festival called 'Eat, Poo, Love.' We got up and carried our lawn chairs and put them into the back of William Blake's compact sedan. We got in and he drove us downtown.

William Blake began saying swear words at ee cummings even though ee cummings was not even there. I asked William Blake if he was okay. William Blake said he had tourettes now or something. I said okay. It was almost 10pm and the show was starting at 11pm and apparently tickets would sometimes sell out an hour before, so William Blake drove there fast even though he got lost a few times.

There were many things in William Blake's car including a soccer ball, a mini soccer ball, a tissue box, a backpack, a baseball cap, and hundreds of pieces of paper. One of the pieces of paper was a little ad for a Fringe Festival show called:

'Christ

Christ

Christ'

I asked William Blake what it was about. He said I probably wouldn't want to see it. William Blake still thought I was a blockheaded conservative fundamentalist. I was never a fundamentalist actually. I was raised within the sentiments of fundamentalism, but I always held them with caution and minor rationality. I still had respect towards some fundamentalist views and values now, though I believed many of their perspectives to be severely flawed. I told William Blake that I had experienced sacrilegious art before. I told him artists created sacrilegious art to make a point and not without reason. 

He asked, What if they did create sacrilegious art for no reason, would you still see it? I said that there was no such thing, and at the lowest level of sacrilegious art there is at least an attack on the violence of dogma. He said, Well do you consider yourself dogmatic? I think you are, then he left a big gap in his sentence and looked back at me and said, just a little bit. I thought it was kind of mean of him to answer his own question for me. Then I realized not all statements that end with a question mark are actually questions. Sometimes they are just portions of an insult.

Then he asked, Do you still not believe in evolution? I told him I believed in evolution, but was not certain about it. I told him I was uneducated in that topic and I could make no certain assumptions. I said something about Galileo and the church making stubborn oversights in history before. He said, Finally!, or something like that and sat there as though he had won something.